In his book “Making Things Right”, Dr.Faulkner believes there is a distinct difference in the listening ability between men and women. Dr.Faulkner suggests that women are wired for 440 volts. We have little emotional wires sticking out from us in all directions. Women are wired for sound and two-way communication. We talk and receive. We hook into another person's emotions and needs.
On the other hand, men are wired for 12 volts. That's all. Men have two little wires sticking out, and they're both bent. Their speakers are usually hooked up, but receivers are dead. So men have to work a lot harder to listen than the women do. We're just wired differently. Men are like two tin cans and a waxed string, but women are hooked up like Ma Bell.
Archie and Edith Bunker's communication difficulties probably had little to do with one speaking English and other communicating in 'dingbat'. Dr.Faulkner might suggest that Archie Bunker give some serious attention to his bent wires and dead receiver.
I noticed that some men are good listener but they're just forgetful, men don't register what they've heard in their mind most of the time.
What's your opinion? Guys!
Perhaps you can let us know what can women do to contribute to your 12-volt wiring system, to help to improve your reception?
Perhaps you can let us know what can women do to contribute to your 12-volt wiring system, to help to improve your reception?
54 comments:
huh, what? ummm HMMM...
Pink Said: I noticed that some men are good listener but they're just forgetful, men don't register what they've heard in their mind most of the time.
OK I agree with this part, I listen and try to be as sincere as I can BUT I tend not to HOLD on to EVERY detail not out of being RUDE, I just forget and BOY do I hear it from past relationships--geesh You women DONT FORGET ANYTHING :-(
Take it easy on us boys, most of us are good....((when we are sleeping))--hahaa no we are good for the most part BUT we are wired differently..GOOD POST.
我的英文太差，不太了解這篇的意涵，是講溝通嗎？
最後一段結論：是什麼是您的看法? 人! 或許您能告訴我們什麼罐頭婦女做對您的12 伏特接線系統貢獻, 幫助改進您的招待會?
罐頭婦女？
hmmmm what did he say?? :-)
I wasn't really listening.
But I do have one thing to say:
用筷子吃飯算是高難度的動作，也很細膩，沒經過訓練是很困難平順的完成。
Ok..my thoughts on this are:
men talk simple&direct, men have no trouble understanding one another, it's basically GRUNT GRUNT..oh yeah dude I get it..grunt grunt.
women on the other hand talk around stuff, it's like "you know the dresser in the other room, I'm thinking I'd like to change some things, maybe the color, or the knobs or do something with the lighting!!
Men get lost in this conversation because we have short attention spans..
Next time say.."honey I want a new lamp for the dresser"
tc
Bob - "men don't listen, women don't forget". Even the author commented that we're wired differently.
To learn from a past relationships would make you a better lover, keep running. :)
披头王 - 对的，是讲沟通。专家说男人总是不懂得听，男人的接线系统不像女人来的齐全。所以男人需要改进。你同意吗？
其他的人都想知道你问的问题。我会替你翻译。
Dan / Bob - This person doesn't really understand English, so he needs to use the translation dictionary to figure out the meaning of my blog, but he got problem with this one, because there's too many 'wire' that make him confuse.
I give him a credit, for his will to learn.
Dan, you're funny!!
do you know that the quote is copyright?
maybe you should tell us what does it mean?
Topcat - Men talk direct, for women, hinting & guessing are just part of the romance.
instead of saying "I want a new lamp for the dresser"
I would say : "Honey, let's change a new lamp for the dresser together, and I will watch ESPN with you tonight."
I liked reading this post :) .
Thanks for sharing.
Wish you well
I have both experiences with my husband. There will be times when he is so in tune with me and I think, "Wow, he is exceptional and unlike the average man!" But then there are those times when it is definitely the 12-volt wiring....it goes in one ear and out the other. (And I don't mean my nagging him) If I was doing that to him, I can understand the shutting off mechanism because I do the same if I feel like he's nagging me. I just mean sometimes I'll be talking to him and he's out in la la land or he'll change the subject so abruptly I know he wasn't listening to me. It gets kind frustrating but I can't blame him too much because I catch myself doing it too at times. I think we are all guilty of it, the guys are usually guilty of it more often! :)
that was really insightful. no wonder women can give shock treatment to men whenever needed!! LOL!!
;-))
pink ginger,
I agree with the whole wiring concept. As the mother of sons I gave up long ago trying to get through about some things. Post It notes are the answer! If they SEE it, they get it! lolol hugsssss
I'm sorry. Were you saying something? :-)
Women and men are definately wired differently. Just watch what happens when they watch a movie together. Especailly a romantic comedy.
The woman will be crying and think the movie is soooo sweet. The guy will look bored. LOL
Hey, followed your link through Sam-GiRL's blog. Nice blog, keep it up, I must say I enjoy the read.
cheers
Very intersting entry, and thanks for the heads up on wanting us guy-folk to reply. I'm not trying to sound like I'm some kind of romantic, but I am a writer, and try to listen to everyone equally. I pride myself on recalling people from emails or writing conventions and things and events they have talked about. Sadly, when it comes to family or co-workers, sometimes the sheer repetition of some things are, forgive me, lost in translation. It is true that women don't forget a thing, but it is always best when a woman is patient enough to let a guy "catch up" with his memory and enter real time. One thing, do I ramble too much? Nice reading your blog.
dont know abt others , i am exception :)
I think it goes with the moods.
Thanx for enlighten our knowlege
about the book...I would to read this...Thanx for stopping by :)
Stay Beautiful...!!
Zingtrial - Welcome. Nice to hear that you enjoy reading this blog.
Gracey - yeah, sometimes women don't listen too, you're very kind to remind us on this.
Deepsat - It would only happens at the right place and the right time.
Lorna - Haha.. post-it is handy and convenient but you will lost in translation if you rely on it too much. :)
Jay - Women like romantic comedy even though the story keeps repeating itself but it's sweet and touchy.
If you want to know the reason, just ask men why they enjoy action movies so much. :)
Blame the wiring system. :)
PHlippy - Thanks for visiting.
Wayne - Nice to meet you and thank you for your comment.
You highlighted a very significant point here : woman should learn to be patient enough to let a guy 'catch up'. I am learning.
Inviting men to speak their mind so we can understand them better.
Prashant - Very interesting!! Please tell us what makes you an exception. Everyone is very interested to know the clue.
Sugarlips - it's very true, a good listener must be in the right mood to listen.
Welcome.
Well, all men can be trained to become good listener and remember the things women said. Just find a deserted island with a small population and stay there, at least for 1 year. Trust me, you listening, observation and memory capability, will improve!!! Cheers :D
I seem to have no difficulty listen to people now. I had to work on this. You have to stop your mind from picking up on key words that are others are saying and running with this in your own mind. You should listen with yur ears your eyes and your heart. Do not talk until the other person has stopped and wait for all thier words to sink into your head before you open your mouth.
Men are different then women in many area of life, but that is what makes it all fun.
I agree women are better at feeling and listening to what someone else is saying. Men are designed differently, for different reasons.
Most people don't like to discuss this because in todays world everyone needs to be equal in everything, I don't agree with that.
We are all equal but we all have different strengths. Men are designed with less emotional response probably because of the type of work and type of situations men find themselves in.
In the special forces military, women would probably question why and have second thoughts about what it is their doing, men just act and suffer silently.
Even though what you say is true, I think it is every man's responsibility to try and be a better listener. I also think it has to do with the influences a guy has growing up. I tended to be around more females than men, so I have an easy job empathizing with both sexes. Depends I guess. :)
Great intellectual post!
great idea pink ginger, I like your attitude except espn is boring.lol
lorna has it right..POST IT NOTES! Yay, I like that idea.
tc
Jerry - really?? why?
Dave - most of the time you will get the feeling that people are just hoping you to stop talking so they can.
Matt - thanks for words of wisdom. I ponder on your comment and agreed with what you said - 'men are designed differently, for different reason'.
If we accept a man, we should respect and understand 'the man nature'.
TC - espn is boring?? wow!! this is a GREAT news for women. (Hugs).
Just stopped by to say hello.Nice post and I think that men can be good listners if they want to.sometimes they just shut their antennas off so they don't have to hear what you are saying.
Say what? For some reason I feel like I just received a 440 volt shock! I never have the surge suppressor hooked up when I need it.
Well, actually the reason is very simple. A person will be more aware of her/his surrounding, when there are less distraction. I was posted to an island, during my national service, for about 2 years. Guess what? My hearing and observation capabilitiy, have shown improvement. Once, I even surprised my wife to be, that I know which day, she have medical appointments. Actually, it's all written on her calender. Please don't let her know. Ha Ha Cheers :D
Yes Pink Ginger, women are very much like the phone company.....
1.)They are not cheap to own.
2.)Mostly reliable, but they have been known to shut down.
3.)Sometimes all you get is static.
4.)They leave when a better offer comes along.
5.)If you don't pay, your cut off!
A LOT like women......G
Hey , thanks for the compliment :-)
and when i said i am exception then it means yes i am different in some traits as you mentioned but not all and you know that is gifted to all by GOD and the only thing that is missing is the awareness to manifest that.
Have a nice day :-)
take care........
Welll, Hmmm... I forgot what I was going to say but I am sure you are incorrect on this... I gotta go back and reread this post....
Hey... there are few men who good listener and they don't forget what we say as well.
Nice post !!
Take care ;>
The day i'll get to know some female, i'll revisit this post and answer....:).
It was interesting piece of information..:)
Have a nice day.:)
LOL, I like that analogy you are speaking of here.
I think it is similar to when I tell my boys to, "Do a girl check not a boy check!"..that's when they are lookin for something they have missplaced, LOL. we all laugh about it.
very interesting....I had to come by since I keep seeing you over on G-Man and Top Cats blogs.
lalitha - welcome.
sage - am sure sometime it happens. :)
jerry - there is a differences between 'hearing' and 'listening'.
To screen through someone's calendar without permisson? I really can't comment.
G-man - you just need to invest to the right company.
Just like Mrs.G, she did not quit after all these years.
You're a smart investor, ain't you?
prashant - well said. :)
dave - I respect your comment.
poo - I agree with you. The minority shines.
sunil - wishing you all the best.
cazzie - you've been educating your kids about this at their young age, Cool !
jodes - welcome. I've been seeing you at their blog very often too. will visit your blog soon.
hey ms. 440V , solution is simple.
give big shocks. i don't think 12V can forget it :)
i don't think men are forgetful. its just that their priorities are different from women. so while a women may consider a b'day celebration more important, guys may consider a vacation trip or long drive more important.
Ha Ha Hi Pink, I didn't screen my wife-to-be calender. She had put it in such a prominent place, which no one can miss it. Humm ... Maybe I will remind her to lock it in a safe. Cheers :-D
LOL @receivera are dead!
I agree with that :):)
Keshi.
Pink, what I said is really copyrighted? I have no idea what I said, by the way. Can I copyright you? Because I want you all for myself. :)
Jeseem - men listen according to their priorities, I agree.
Jerry - :|
Keshi - nice to see you here again.
Dan - are you sure you want to copyright me? it's gonna be a painful journey in your life, as I will not allow you to touch other women's stocking. :)
I think men are more non-verbal than women. (perhaps that was expressed in your presentation.)
Not everything that happens has to be expressed in words!
I think men listen better when the content is meaningful.
For example a woman wants to just be heard and a man wants to solve problems. The man has to listen but is not "supposed to" offer solutions.
Not being able to give solutions is the frustrating part for the man. They hear more than you think.
If the "subject" is interesting a mans ears will perk up.
Attentive and attuned...
I am a good listener but even then at times I feel that woman are impatient ?
The opinion is mine and I wonder, as a woman, if you can take my remark patently ?
hmmm:P
women are over sensitive and men are undersensitive, in general??
i agree :))
goatman - indeed. that's why women are good in hinting, somehow men just wanted us to speak out loud.
tom - please refer to my previous post - "could you just listen".
kuan - nice to see you again.
jac - I agree.
mystic rose - sometime it can be the other way round.
Hi Pink Ginger,
Nice post - interesting, generating good discussion and entertaining too. In response to your question.. I don't know that men are necessarily worse listeners than women. I might take that as a stereotype.. and yet I do notice that communication between men and women is sometimes a challenge - and sometimes not a challenge - depends on the individual people and conversation.
I do believe that where people are determines their ability to focus, receive and also to give. If one speaks and the other listens, no problem. But if one speaks and the other is thinking about other things or daydreaming or not available to listen for any number of reasons, there can be a missed connection. And I think any gender can exemplify that.
Thanks for this post.
Good one.
Steve , Thank you for sharing a very good point here : The challenge in communication between men and women are depends on the individual people and the way they communicate.
I can't agree more.
I'm glad to see you here again.
Despite the overwhelming response to the contrary, I must disagree. It is not just men, who don't listen, women don't either.
My life is riddled with women thinking I said something I didn't and I meant something I never did. With experience I have learnt that the lesser I talk the better they think of me. Am yet to meet a woman who actally listens to what I say and takes it at face value... when there are no hidden meanings, they create them.... No pennies for guessing where the relationship heads from that point!! :)
continuing, having 440 volts does not make them better listeners. They usually wate 420 volts listening to noise, and desciphering meaning out of it.... :)
2lrbl - thank you for sharing. I agree that women should learn to compromise,and to understand, in order to become a better person.
I wish you All the best.
I listn, i listen, just can't remember what was said. Maybe my battery needs charging.
Pat - nice to see you here again.
Sorry - what was the question?
hey,
Interesting post.. The comments r a gud read too :)
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